undivided.


Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Last night Warner took a later nap than usually (4-6pm), which left Evelyn and I with some alone time before dinner prep needed to get started and Jared got home. After 45 minutes of undivided attention with the little gal, I had this feeling wash over me of "ohhhh yesssss, there's that Evy Rae I know and love. And there's our loving relationship that's been rather strained the past 4 months." It was so odd, realizing that I was out of touch with her even though I'm with her 12 hours every day.

Quantity vs quality - isn't that always the struggle? Since the big Warnster has come along, I feel like a good majority of my days are spent disciplining Evelyn. Don't touch that, No don't hit, That's not yours, Not right now, Please wait. It is getting to the point of emotional exhaustion. I was feeling so confused as to why our relationship was taking this turn. Well duh, someone stole her thunder! And while I realized that and tried my best to compensate, I wasn't 100% at peace with my offering to her until the other night. when it was just she and I. Inseparable and giggly for 45 min. Oh, it felt so good to just be with her and know I was giving her my all. I was reminded of what a beautiful soul she is.

21 comments:

  1. Parenthood seems so challenging. I am not a parent, but my two older cousins, with whom I am close, each have a child or two. I don't wish it on myself (at least at this point).

    But, hearing you admit the challenge you have been facing, and one way it was remedied, is very sweet.

    -Kirsten
    mylifetintedpink.blogspot.com

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  2. You're doing a great job. I imagine the adjustment is hard for everyone but Evelyn clearly loves her baby brother and you're taking the time to make sure she knows she's got a special place just for her in Mommys heart.

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  3. Ken, that first picture is to die for!! Also, isn't it interesting how you love both kids equally but there's something special about the firstborn's relationship. And it's a little sad that it'll never be how it was before #2. That precious one on one time becomes ever more enjoyable as its so rare!

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  4. you truely see that these two are siblings!!

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  5. aw :) somedays we just need a little extra attention (feeling acknowledged + loved)..i totally get that!! way to go, mama...you rock!!!

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  6. I love this. I get so nervous about experiencing the same thing with Veda when #2 arrives. I feel like I always learn from your experiences!

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  7. Such a sweet post! I love the pictures of the two of them. Congrats to you on getting TWO babies to smile and look at the camera at the same time! I can barely get this with just one...

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  8. Looks like we are going through the same thing! Maybe with Scotts dad doing construction on our house for the past week (messing up our schedule/not to bad once its done) but I think Judah misses his individual mama time.

    PS cutest pictures ever :-) they both have the same sweet smile

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  9. This is so beautiful. I am worried about the transition from one baby to two that I am going to be going through in a few months.

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  10. This is so sweet, and I love that first picture! With a full-time job, I always worry about whether or not Annaleigh has enough Mommy and Me time. I love having time to just sit and be silly with her.

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  11. Amazing photos! I'm sure being a mommy isn't easy but it sounds like you really are doing a fantastic job. I can't imagine how amazing it must feel to be a mother, I can only hope that one day I'll have one of my own :-)

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  12. I love this post from you Kendra. Tim and I would love to our family in the near future, but even though it's the desire of my heart, it also terrifies me! How will I ever be able to love another child the way I love Maile? How will I ever be able to give Maile all the attention she deserves, with another baby in the home? God willing, I'll figure it all out ... but I'm so happy to read an honest account from someone I'm sure is a wonderful mother. Hugs to you, and I'm so glad you were able to enjoy that precious time!

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  13. I know this feeling. And it's all legit...on the other hand, our children seeing us serve them, discipline (teaching) and seeing us raise another soul besides their own is invaluable. The more children you have the more effort you have to put into making sure that the quality is there for sure, and that's alright. Your parents seem like they did a great job, seeing your videos. How blessed you must feel to have their examples and stewardship to look to. Take care,

    Shauna xoxoxxo

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  14. Such a beautiful post! I think most moms get to feeling this way about our older kids verses the younger/youngest one(s). I seem to notice that a lot with my kids and sometimes feel bad too. But I agree with how you said about quantity vs. quality! Thanks for the reminder of how each individual kid needs that quality time, even though it's not that long! And I am glad that you got that beautiful time shared with your daughter :)

    xoxo,
    Shio

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  15. This is absolutely the truth. I feel like I "discipline" Charlie too much. I need to just be more relaxed and "play" more.

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  16. Awh, what a sweet post! As a younger sibling, I always feel guilty of taking a lot of attention away from my sister when we were little... I think quality time with everyone is so important!

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  17. I'm not a parent (yet). Nonetheless, it is refreshing to read your blog because you are honest about the challenges that parenthood presents. I love reading your blog!
    thehartungs.blogspot.ca

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  18. I always seem to learn something new when I check out your blog. Thanks so much for all the info.
    Septorinoplasti

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  19. Cute kids and cute blog. New reader. :)

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  20. These photos are darling! That's great that you got to spend some quality time with your daughter. My husband is dying to name our next child Evelyn, if it's a girl. I'm pretty fond of the name myself :-)

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