thoughts on growing up

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

photo from yesterday's plane ride

Sometimes I am unsure about whether certain posts I write should be kept in my journal for me privately, or if what is in my heart should be shared with others. I tend to be a bit emotional these days, so bear with me over the next few months as I work out my hormones :)

Yesterday when Evelyn and I got off the plane in Virginia, there was mass excitement in my heart as I anticipated seeing my one and only. As we exited through baggage claim there we saw DaDa waiting for us. Tears swelled in my eyes as I put Evelyn down and she ran to the man she was so familiar with. When we got home Jared had a banner hanging up for us welcoming us home, with a caramel apple waiting for me on the counter {that man knows my weaknesses all to well}. We spent the evening with hands interlocked as we sat against the wall of all uncomfortable places, watching our little girl play. Occassionally she would run up to Dad and give him a hug and go back to playing. We were a happy family of three together again.

Being at my parents' for 2 weeks was amazing. I loved spending time with my siblings. And my parents proved to be interactive and giving grandparents, which I always knew they would be. My sister drove up one weekend from San Diego to make sure she got to see us. Time was spent laughing over family memories and making new ones with a first generation of grandchildren. Overall, Evelyn and I were showered with family love, which always does the soul good.

One Saturday we had a sisters day, where the 3 of us did girly things like give ourselves manicures. Amidst our chatter, we had Taylor Swift on. Her song "never grow up" circled about. Have you heard it? It's beautiful. As I listened to what she was saying, I obviously thought about what it takes to grow up.

I loved being a kid. I loved my wild forts in the backyard, riding my bike around the neighborhood with no hands, watering my mom's garden and thinking that the flowers could actually talk to me, having tea parties with my American Girl dolls, going fishing with Dad, making up songs with my sister and just being so so close to all my siblings. Those bonds can never be severed. But while childhood was fantastic and I wouldn't trade it for the world, I am so glad I grew up.

Had I not grown up, I would probably still be petty and teenage self-absorbed. I am so glad the days of friend cliques and Abercrombie clothing are behind me. Had I not grown up, I wouldn't know what true love feels like. Had I not grown up, I wouldn't know the joy and pain of child birth. The experience of watching Evelyn peacefully sleep in my arms or admiring her new found excitement for twirling {so darn cute!} would not be known to me. Had I not grown up, I would not have the appreciation I now do for my parents and their years of counsel and example. Had I not grown up, I would not understand the power and mercy of God. And had I not grown up I wouldn't know how strong I was capable of being.

Sure, the downside of growing up is getting older. I'm not saying that I'm excited to get to 50. I'm sure by then I'll be wishing for my younger body, but right now I'm happy to be growing up. Each new year, heck, each new day brings something better than before. But when it comes to Evelyn, that girl better NEVER grow up ;)


  1. Oh this is such a sweet post, Im so glad you had such a fabulous two weeks with your family but your right there's NO place like home in the arms of the one you love!!!!!!!!

  2. Such a great post! I love the photos at the end! And, a week is a long time, I am sure you missed home so much!

  3. ah, there are so many mixed emotions swirling around about growing up. I have been working on a post for Behr's 15 months, nothing over the top, but I can't seem to find the words of the feelings that come with this baby of mine becoming so independent. I can only imagine how it is with Evelyn, at the same age, plus the hormones of pregnancy. Beautifully written, my dear! Thanks so much for sharing.

  4. that song makes me cry my eyeballs out every single time!

  5. Such a lovely post and I am enjoying growing up at the moment too--it seems that more and more exciting opportunities happen with each day.

  6. I've never heard the song, must listen now! I'm only 19 but sometimes I'm afraid to grow up! I feel like a lot of my childhood years were wasted and I regret not being able to do so many things I wanted. At the same time, I feel like life gets better with age. After being in college I've learned so much about myself and the world around me. I hope it keeps getting better from here on out.

  7. I used to not want to grow up and tried to cling to my younger self. But, after having kids things just changed. There are so many wonderful things about growing up and raising your children. I just love it!

  8. Beautifully written. I agree with all that you have said. I enjoy being an adult much more than I ever enjoyed my teenage years (and I has a wonderful childhood). I am just enjoying this stage in my life more than I have enjoyed any other stage.

  9. I really enjoyed this post. Glad you decided to let us read it.

    I bet when you're fifty you'll be even happier that you grew up. I can relate to much of what you said. Fun times were had but now are behind and motherhood, being a wife, a grown woman-this is where the real character building begins and builds and builds.

    I share in the same revel of watching my children, seeing their carefree spirits shine forth, their ceaseless energy, their intelligence, their creativity, their love for the gospel and their Father in Heaven, as I could go on and on.

    What I love most about this post is that you have wonderful parents. That you love and appreciate their wise counsel that they were examples to you and paved the way for you-what a blessing, truly. Very touching.

    Take good care,


  10. SO sweet that you had a good time with your family, and that you were so happy to come home to your family of 3. Lovely post x

  11. sweet post and lovely to have your little family together again. I'm sure you husband missed you very much which you can tell by his sweet gestures for you arrival home.