We're learning about the meaning of the word "wait!" over here and the importance of delayed gratification. Sometimes being a mom seems so complex when you realize you are responsible for this little person's habits that form them into a big person. Evelyn's outburts have become more dramatic lately, so we've been working tirelessly on roping that back in. It's been a challenge, but luckily she's a gem 80% of the time:) Luckily I've found a friend in the pages of this book. It's nice when you have someone who can relate to you, even if it's just words on a page. And who knows if the French really parent like she says, but it sounds pretty darn perfect that I hope someone is enjoying peaceful fruits of their mothering labors :)
It takes patience on both of our parts, but Evelyn and I will be come out on top. I just know it. She really is a good girl.
I just rented the CD of this book from the library! The wait list for the book is like 5 months long. I might just go buy it from Barnes and Nobles because we are also dealing with delayed gratification. Its really hard especially when Scott wants to spoil Judah rotten by buying him something every single time we go out. (hence why we have way to many toys!)
ReplyDeleteI saw a tidbit on the news last night where they said research has been done where babies who are left to cry for a little bit have no less or more of the hormones that cause stress. Of course don't leave the babes to cry it out for hours but letting kids get a little cry in won't hurt their brains. And as I think we all know, sometimes letting it out and crying feels good!
ReplyDeleteI LOVED reading that book - I only wish I had read it sooner! Such common sense things that, when you're dealing with all of the other outside pressures/words of other people/books/advice/etc, seem to get lost! I do think it's an important skill to learn, and although very (sometimes VERY VERY) difficult for a toddler to figure out, I'm confident the effort will be worth it! x
ReplyDeleteLove this post!!I grew up in France and I saw so many parents hit their kids or really make them fall in line lol! The book is quite off on how the French parent, but I like what she says in that quote, and there really was an emphasis on taking into consideration other people, which is very important. Granted, when I was a kid this was more because we were to fit in and not stand out. I am hoping our daughter will become more patient and slowly but surely she is!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad to have your opinion on this! My friend who spent a good number of years in France said this was a bit off, too. I'm not taking to heart EVERYTHING that she says because I'm sure most of it is just surface observations and I hardly think I could be that disconnected of a parent, but there are gems of wisdom she has to offer.
DeleteI think that it easier to parent and be parented in the manner when more children come along. Of course, starting out with twins is the perfect scenario for delayed gratification :), but it becomes simpler as the need arises.
ReplyDeleteI think something important to remember is that our children are modeling themselves after their parents. If we as parents are "instantly gratified" then it's not unusual for our kids to desire the same.
Also, vis a vis the tantrum and outbursts- don't be too worried! This too shall pass.
Thanks, Sarah!
DeleteI've heard about this book. Now I've gotta have it, I think. My two year old is 2 parts drive me crazy and 1 part melt my heart cute. I hear ya!
ReplyDeleteoh i totally feel you! my little brooks and i are trying to figure it out together as well...emotions and feelings are all part of the game of life. learning how to deal with them and those around us is key. :) thank you for sharing that quote, i definitely needed it.
ReplyDeleteand evelyn is so SO cute, even when frustrated ;)
I read an article about French parenting related to this & just did a silent fist pump.
ReplyDeleteWe started a schedule when my son was a week old. Set meal times, nap times, etc.. Obviously there were days that didn't go completely as planned but he grew up realizing that just because he made a fuss, didn't mean he got out of nap time/etc.. He's almost 3 and already has a strong sense of order.
May not be for everyone but we dig it.
Yep, we've done Baby Wise with Evelyn and it works beautifully! I am a pretty good scheduler as well. Now we're working on developing her moral character, which is taking more patience :)
DeleteJust found your blog from Casey Leigh's link up from Friday and I'm a huge fan! Definitely adding you to my reading list :)
ReplyDeleteAnd, I love this post! It can be so overwhelming knowing that you're responsible for shaping this little person. I love to hear other's points of view on the subject and will definitely be looking into that book.